But Now
by MBooker
Summary: Tony shares his secret with Michelle and continues to insist that he is not a poet. This is a companion piece for chapter 1, now titled Those Eyes.
1. Those Eyes

**Author's Note**: _Well, this is my first T/M fic. I had watched that scene when Tony told Michelle he had decided to keep personal and professional stuff separate and one day while I was sitting at work taking a mental break, I thought 'I want to know what changed Tony's mind'. So I decided to sit down and just write and here's what I came up with. It short, but I hope you like! Also, I am working on a post s4 piece and when I post that, I'll pay homage to all the great T/M writers I've had the chance to read and enjoy._

**Summary**: _What made Tony decide to put personal and professional back together again?_

* * *

"Almeida."

"Tony, Michelle Dessler is here."

"OK, thanks. Could you walk her back?"

"To the conference room?"

"No, my desk."

"Sure thing."

"Thanks" I hung up and dialed Mason's extension.

"Mason."

"George, Michelle Dessler is here."

"Who?"

"Michelle Dessler, our 10:00 interview."

"She's early."

I looked down at my watch. It was 9:45.

"Maybe she's just punctual" I looked up and saw her walking toward me.

I couldn't tell you much of what happened during the interview but I can tell you what happened after.

"I like her. I think we should hire her."

"I don't think so."

"What? Why? She's the last and most qualified candidate. And she comes highly recommended from Division. What the hell else do you want?"

"Something's not right. I don't think she'll work out."

"And why not?"

I couldn't tell George that… the _something not right_ was Ms. Michelle Dessler herself. I couldn't tell him that there was something about her that made me… nervous, uneasy. That something about her set me on edge.

"I don't know. She just doesn't seem like a good fit."

"Tony, we've interviewed over 30 people. She seems like the perfect fit to me. And if you can't come up with something other than _She just doesn't seem like a good fit, _you're going to put the paperwork through to hire her."

George walked out of the conference room, leaving me with a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. George was right. She _was_ the perfect fit.

But, still, I couldn't shake the feeling. There _was _something about her…

That bad feeling in the pit of my stomach was still lingering 2 ½ months later as I sat across from her at a staff meeting.

I found myself gazing at her wondering, for the umpteenth time, what it was about her...

And then, to my great embarrassment, she caught me staring at her. I was quick on my feet though and smiled at her as if I just _happened_ to glance her way the precise moment she glanced my way. She smiled back and I shifted my eyes and pretended to be paying attention to Mason.

When I felt enough time had passed, I stole another glance in her direction.

I still had not figured out what it was about her that made me nervous, that made me uneasy.

She was an attractive woman. I was attracted to attractive women. That had no bearing… _I had sworn off co-workers_.

She was very attractive. Exotically attractive, in fact. I was attracted to very attractive, exotically attractive women. Again, no bearing... _I had sworn off co-workers_.

She was an intelligent woman. Intelligence was a turn-on. But once again, that had no bearing… _I had sworn off co-workers_.

She had a sense of humor. An attractive, exotically attractive and intelligent woman with a sense of humor… she was batting a thousand. But still, no bearing… _I had sworn off co-workers_.

I frowned. What the hell was it about this woman…?

At that moment, she caught me ogling her **_again_**. She frowned a bit, but gave me a smile anyway.

And then I knew… I knew what it was about this woman.

It was those eyes.

Eyes that had the potential to make me renege on my vow to never, ever again look at a female co-worker as anything other than just that – a co-worker.

When Casey had walked her back to my desk 2 ½ months ago and I stood up go greet her…

"Tony, Michelle Dessler. Ms Dessler, Tony Almeida" Casey introduced us.

"Ms Dessler" I extended my hand and took her small one in mine.

"Mr. Almeida" those eyes looked up at me.

I'm not a man given to talking like a poet or anything but damn... Those eyes… with just one look, I felt lost in them. Hell, I think I _was_ lost… All because of those eyes.

Because of those eyes, I couldn't hire her… Because of those eyes, but I did.

Because of those eyes, I had to keep my distance… Because of those eyes, but I didn't.

Because of those eyes, I couldn't date her… Because of those eyes, but I did.

Because of those eyes, I had to keep my heart… Because of those eyes, but I didn't.

And now…

I'm down on one knee… All because of those eyes.


	2. Right Now And Ever After

**Author's Note**: _I had no idea that this would go beyond a one shot deal when I typed my first word for _**_But Now. _**A_fter typing my last word for _**_But Now,_**_ the tiniest of flickers flashed crossed my imagination but I didn't give it much thought. Then I read **Make Believe** by **AnnabelGrey**. It made me wanna cry but the intensity of emotion somehow put a spark to this mere flicker in my imagination and I sat down and wrote. Here's what I came up with. I hope you like!_

**Summary**: _Tony shares his secret with Michelle and continues to insist that he is not a poet._

* * *

"Remember when I told you I had decided to keep personal and professional stuff separate?"

"Yeah" she smiled and I guessed she was remembering that day she put me on the spot.

"_Listen, ah, what we were talking about before… Yeah, um, I'm sorry. I, ah, I shouldn't of put you on the spot like that… Well, no. Actually, I'm glad you did… You are… Yeah. There's been something hanging between us since you started here… Yeah, yeah there has… I made a decision a while ago to try to keep personal and professional stuff separate… but now, I ah…"_

And then the damn phone rang and killed my momentum… and saved me from making a fool of myself and sounding like an idiot from one of those romance novels my mother reads. I was on the verge of losing all common, rational sense because it was on the tip of my tongue to tell her that I think I fell in love with her the first time I looked into those eyes.

"Ever wonder what made me change my mind?" I grinned as I took one of those wild curls and wrapped it around my finger like she had wrapped me around hers.

She gave me that smile… the one I was crazy about… the one that said I was embarrassing the hell out of her…

"I wondered…" her smile got bigger, her cheeks got redder.

Those eyes were looking up at me in that special way she had perfected and were about to do a number on me.

"You still wonder?" I asked, slipping into those eyes.

"Sometimes."

Still grinning, still slipping I said, "And you've never asked?"

I raised the hand I was holding and kissed the back of it. Then I turned it over and landed a kiss in the center of her palm.

She likes it when I do that.

If it was possible, and apparently it was, her smile got even bigger, but she didn't answer me. She just kept looking up at me… with those eyes. I wondered if she knew what she was doing to me… with those eyes.

"So are you ever gonna ask?" I said, trying to take back control of the situation.

"Why don't you just tell me" she suggested.

"You have to ask."

"Are we being difficult?"

"_We_ aren't being difficult baby. _You_ are."

"I am not" she insisted.

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not."

We were at a standoff. And if I remembered correctly, at our last standoff, I gave in so it was her turn.

…

…

"What changed your mind?" she _finally_ acquiesced.

"About what?"

"Tony!" she slapped me on the shoulder, faking a frown that I completely ignored.

"You have to ask the _entire_ question" I said as I rubbed the tip of her nose with the tip of mine before stealing a quick kiss.

She likes it when I do that.

"What made you change your mind… about keeping personal and professional stuff separate?" she smiled, embarrassed as hell but still breaking me down with, you guessed it, those eyes.

Remember when I said I'm not a man given to talking like a poet or anything? Well, I'm still not but, damn it, I'll say it again… damn… those eyes.

Still holding the hand that I had kissed, I dropped to one knee.

"_Tony_…" her voice shook and those eyes looked at me with disbelief. "W_ha… what are you doing_? **_Oh MY GOD_**!" she whispered in the next breath as those eyes started to cry.

Now _I'm_ nervous as hell.

"It was those eyes" I began.

"**_Oh MY GOD_**" her lips moved but her voice was inaudible as the biggest tear slid down her cheek.

"Because of those eyes, I couldn't hire you… Because of those eyes, I did. Because of those eyes, I had to keep my distance… Because of those eyes, I didn't. Because of those eyes, I couldn't date you… Because of those eyes, I did. Because of those eyes, I had to keep my heart… Because of those eyes, I didn't. And now… I'm down on one knee… All because of those eyes."

"_Tony… **Oh MY GOD**_"her trembling voice was barely a whisper as another tear slid down her cheek.

"Those eyes began to wrap themselves around my heart from the first day I met you. I never believed in love at first sight, but now…"

…

"Those eyes began to touch me in ways I never thought possible. I never believed in love at second sight, but now…"

…

"Those eyes began to make me believe in a love that I thought was reserved for only a few. I never believed in love at third sight, but now…"

…

"Those eyes have captured me… Those eyes have touched me… Those eyes have made me believe."

…

"And now… I want to make those eyes mine. I want to make them mine right now and ever after."

…

"Michelle, I need you. I want you. I want to make you mine… right now and ever after. Will you… Will you be mine… Will you be mine right now and ever after?"

She stood there looking down at me and said nothing, nothing at all. Not one damn peep.

I broke out in a sweat. Maybe I shouldn't have done this.

Maybe I shouldn't have hired her. Maybe I should have kept my distance. Maybe I shouldn't have dated her. Maybe I should have kept my heart.

Maybe this was all a mistake. Maybe…

"Yes" those lips finally uttered. "Yes" she dropped to her knees. "Yes" she was eye level with me, tears running down that beautiful face. "Yes" she leaned in as I met her ½ way. "Yes" she whispered into my open mouth as I covered those lips with mine.

And now…

Yes… Those eyes are mine… Yes… Those lips are mine… Yes… that head of wild, curly hair is mine… Yes…She is mine… Yes…She is _all_ mine… right now and ever after.


End file.
